Shine

reason

2012-01-27T14:25:00.000+08:00

Today, a man asked me, " you sure love running don't you ?" . I smile and walked away. It wasn't because i was shy.No, that wasn't it. I didn't want to drag him on for hours explaining why i run. The answer had always been there, since the start. Just one question.

I run
because there's only me. I need not care how everyone else was doing. I don't have to care how fast they run. Its all about me and myself. I am able to listen to my body. I know my body more. The parts that hurt, the organs that requires attention, i can tell.

I run
because it takes me away from reality. That moment when i start my journey, i am leaving behind my troubles. I am always looking forward and not caring about whats behind me. I think less of what takes time and energy away. I am no longer bounded to the mental stress of reality, and instead dealing only with the physical stress that i can control. I stay focus on whats ahead of me, instead of whats bothering me.

I run
because i won't be judged. I've never been one to really excel in one particular talent. I'm not brilliant, i can't play musical instruments, i'm only mediocre when it comes to everything else. Running isn't about being able to excel. One cannot be judged solely on the time they complete a distance. Running times are relative to their discipline. Its because of that, i am judged, based on my own will, my determination.

I run
because there's not another feeling that can match the excitement when you complete your target. That moment you see the ending line, adrenaline pumps up, and when you step over that timing device, you know that you've just accomplished a feat that not many dare to challenge. On the finishing line, you know that, you can proudly say, "I've done it". That feeling when you look back at your doubts and spat on them. You've just beaten yourself.

I run
to prove to myself that i can take a beating, and still move forward. When i feel like giving up, i tell myself that the end is near, and will eventually reach the place where i can finally rest my head upon. Its the self-confidence that i try to make myself belief that gets me going. Because when no one is there to believe in you, you've got to believe in yourself. Prove doubters wrong

Chapter

2011-12-15T10:50:00.001+08:00

Some people go crazy about books. Some can't live without them. Others grow up reading books. Some didn't bother touching one. Believe it or not, books will change your life. The way you think, the emotions you feel and the knowledge you gain. Sometimes it makes you cry and sometimes it makes your day. Every person will have their kind of book. Drama, action, romance, tragic just to name a few. Every book is special in its own way. You learn different things with each read. Just take caution, that you don't skim through the contents. You'll miss out on a lot of things and you find yourself at the end of the chapter in a short time.

Reading a book shouldn't feel like a burden or chore. Instead, take your time to fully understand the book, because you want to. Each chapter will bring you different experience. You learn more about the book than anyone else. By the end of the book, you'd probably know it inside out. Your daily lives revolves about the book and its contents even after you've closed it. Because you know that, that book changed you. But, its time to find another book. When will i find the next book?

Until the next book arrives,

my mindset will remain,

however insignificant amount,

because that book changed me.

Caution

2011-11-19T13:32:00.000+08:00

Be careful.

When you say something, keep to your words. These times might be hard, but don't give up. You need to stick to your words. You need to show them how great you are.

Many promises have been voiced out, but many uncompleted. What is the point of promising something and not fulfilling them?

What is the purpose of a person being in a place and time? What is the purpose of voicing out those promises?

Time wasting is not an option. It is something a person will never reclaim. Make full use of it.

Those words repeat themselves.

Mind is cluttered

Unsure of the wants

and the needs

Betrayed thy own self

and became what was one hated.

Slow down

2011-09-16T07:11:00.001+08:00

I sat there wondering, what the hell went wrong. My mind was all blur and messed up. I couldn't think properly. I couldn't act properly. I got up and i made my way. Unsure of my action, i just went along with the initial plan. Then i stopped and wondered. Why am i doing this?

It was at that very spot, that i realized i'm so out of touch with everything. I was blured and wandered off track. I stepped out. The cold wind pressed against my face, messing up my hair and numbing my fingers. But one thing was a miss. Something stood out in this winter-like-moment. My heart. It was warm.

Each step i took. Each breath i take. They got my body colder as i walk directly into the wind, taking in cold air. The harsh cold wind was like a slap in the face. An eye opener. My mind was uncluttered. My nostrils cleared. My eyes can see what i would normally miss. I was alive.

I remembered my good friend Darryl who sent me a pdf file on Street Photography. One part of the topic was getting over photographer block. To overcome the lack of inspiration. The tip was, to walk around town without a camera. Instead use your eyes to look for things. And i looked, and i found them. Although i was quite sad that i missed all those potential pictures, but boy am i upbeat because i saw them. The feeling of spotting a potential moment was so awesome.The inspirations are coming back. The spirit and passion was filling up as i walked around town. Sure, capturing a beautifully exposed, well composed picture would be excellent, but street photography is more than just that. It's a new found respect and love for photography. It's about capturing emotion. Its about capturing the moment. Its about the story that lies withing the picture.I saw people's expression. I saw how life was tough for beggars. I saw Toronto's lifestyle . I saw compassion. I saw love.

Speaking about love, i ran across an elderly couple at an intersection. They had white hair, wrinkled face, hunched back. Typical elderly? yea sure, why not. But something was different about them. They were walking pinky in pinky. Yes the little finger on your hands. The one you make pinky promise. Instead , this couple were walking, not hand in hand, but pinky in pinky. And they both had the same windbreaker. One was pink, one was blue. How sweet could that be? First i thought, this would make such a good photo! That tells the tale, of how love can be so sweet at any age. Then i thought about my parents. How they can be so cute and loving at times. Then i thought about them, and how much care and love they've given me all this while despite all the scoldings. I miss them so much.

Then i thought about my girl. Being this far apart, in a country where their customs are so different, i wished she was here. But she isn't. At the times where i needed her, she wasn't there. Her physical presence was missing. The distance took us by storm. We grew apart. We were stretched. Tension was too much. I got irrational. I was slowly consumed by the distance. I became impatient. I am losing it.

The cold wind brushed against my face once more, and i found my self smiling. I didn't know why at first. Then i realized, hey,i'm still young, and i've still got plenty of time. Lets just head on to tomorrow and see what happens. In the mean time, i've got to slow down.

Unforgettable

2011-09-07T11:03:00.002+08:00

I want to say, sorry for not making this earlier. I've been busy and internet connection here is rare to get.

Thanks Darryl for fetching me to airport and accompanying me to send off my parents. Thanks for being such a good friend, a good mentor and an overall good person. You've taught me, guided me, and showed me a whole lot to photography and life. All your dumbass terms and moves, i've learnt. Some yet to try. You really helped me developed my photography and myself. Will never forget our biking trips and my whole time knowing you. Although our time knowing each other was short, but i feel like i've known you for a long time.Wouldn't have met if it wasn't for koks and that nike event. No wonder our facebook friendship picture is the pass.

Thanks Adrian for being there for me when in need. We've both gone through quite similar path i might say. Thanks for helping me pack in that hectic panic moment. You asshole say want go award presentation. Thanks again for being one of my closest friend. From form 2 backseat gang to today, you're still an awesome person. We've gone through so many things together, from badmintons to marathons to photography to eating in class to being jakuns in labs, each memorable by themselves. Learn a lot from our chats and hang outs. And you bish, still remember the chocolates. <3

Thanks Darryl and Adrian for these wonderful yet, significant gifts. They mean a lot to me. Gotta keep the choco box for remembrance

Thanks Weichern and Koks for being the dumbass friends that gets me into shits. You guys make things more lively with all your ridiculous antics. From the GTI punggol wagon to LP you guys always make road trips more fun and exciting. And who can forget valhalla nights. Damn you guys are the shits. Remember guys, must live more than 80. Together on death bed wait your fathers to call!

Thanks my sisters! Chiaw yin, mun yee, hui wen and krystle for all the advice and girl talks. You guys helped me a lot with all my problems. From the indian bollywood dance, i've grown hell a lot close with you all. All the skipping class, joking around behind the hall, and our ridiculous practice session were good times. Wouldn't mind doing it all over again. and Krystle, for all the night owling, spongebob-ing and ride-at-night-with-koks-to-see-you. And in the future you shall be my marketing manager. All that publicity you made for my photo earned me that camera. Fank youz!

Thanks Jun Wen and Chee Ming for being my 2nd family. From box 5 seat till now, you guys are just wonderful to be around with. You guys are funny as hell man. You guys can make someone laugh till they cry or pee. Especially you, chee ming, and koks together. All your shaolin soccer shit. Laser tag again when we have our reunion! and a ride in your tank jun wen!

Thanks Ooi giap and Chun hoe for being the childish assholes. You guys the funny dumbass shit. You guys a dick. From all the spongebob and russell peters to the epic yumcha night driving in under powered car, you guys make me laugh like there's nothing to frown at. Driving to broga, meeting dumbass bangala and kfc girl, breaking ankles. You guys are awesome man. And thanks for being the joker friends as well.

Thanks Andy and Chor Kuan for sending me off. Ok thats all. Oh hell no! but really thanks for being really awesome classmates. Mandy, i wish you all the best with your boyfriend.Oh shit. Team phoenix and tapir! and Chor kuan, you terrorist! You shoot people. And come up with really nice photos. You guys are awesome. Meet up for testimonial football match yo!

Thanks Wen Yee for being Ms. Awesome and si tao poh and loe pan leong. You've been one of my great and close friend. One who knows a lot about me, one who lectures me, advice me and taught me on how to be a better person. Thanks for being so open minded and straight forward, unafraid to tell the truth. Thanks for being so strong when im in need. From the badminton and marathon days, you've always been like a female version of me. Cycling and jogging, emo talks, yumcha sessions, surprise kok-yang-needs-to-use-your-toilet birthday and of course your wen yee quotes. They will all be missed, very much.

and of course, thanks my love, Chrystelle. For without your love and care, i wouldn't be as happy as i would without you. You've showered me with so much love and affection, that words like these are understatements. Thanks for always being there for me when im down or happy. Thanks for bringing me into your life, and your family. They are all wonderful people, that i've really enjoyed getting to know. From our park, cheesy quotes to our trips, our arguments, our make up, our journeys, our memories, and everything about us, i will remember them always. No matter the distance, i know apart of me will always be with you. Thank you for being in my life. And for keeping me warm and fuzzy during winter. I love you! <3

I wish you all the best in your future. I've been blessed to have you all in my life. And more. I'm forever in debt to you guys. When i become a successful photographer-civil engineer i'll never forget you guys. Who knows? your photos might appear in my portfolio =) Till we meet again, i love you all!

Chime

2011-01-27T23:32:00.002+08:00

As the wind blows, this wind chime makes a tone. No matter a light breeze or a hurricane, it won't stop giving out sweet melodies. As humans, we tend to change mood. Some chance more often. Please don't keep it all to yourself. I tend to think its my fault. It hurts me more knowing that you're hiding your true emotions from me. It hurts me when you said don't worry about me. It hurts me that i don't know whats going on. It hurts me knowing that i can't do anything right now, other than to shed tears and write this post. It hurts me that we both said we going to be honest to each other. It hurts me the most that you lied to me when i clearly can tell that you are lying.

I want to be there for you

i want to be the shoulder for you to lean on

i want to know whats going on

i don't want to be left in the dark.

Wonder

2011-01-25T21:43:00.000+08:00

Alone time was something common in my past. Sat there and ponder upon things that happened and might happen. Hell a lot of thinking. Many were unnecessary, many were fantasies. Its been a roller coaster of a ride since that day. Definitely lots of highs, but a few moments of lows. Even in one day, i can feel all emotions running through me. Once more, i find myself sitting alone thinking what to do?

I want you to eat right, and heal fast. Tried my best to warn you about things to not eat, what to eat. Made that ginger water for you, bottled that herbal drink for you. But i myself, wouldn't bother with myself. Hypocrite. LOL Gave you a silent treatment upon that one cough. Probably shouldn't have done that. The silence was rather cruel and eerie, despite that beautiful smile on your face.

Then when it happened, you showed tantrum. I didn't know how to react. I didn't know what to do. Its not that i didn't care, but rather i didn't know how because everyone was looking. I am still not used to showing my emotions in public. I would have ran after you, grab you by the waist and utter sweet words. But i can't find myself doing that at the moment. Its not that i didn't want to but i remembered back when i was single, and couldn't take PDA's from my friends. I felt so out of place. I felt like saying " get a room!".

But when you put your arms around me, i secretly felt happy. Obviously, it felt good. Your arms around me, head resting on my shoulders, feeling your breath on my skin. I didn't want you to stop, but at times, i wonder what will your friends think? Will the feel the same way i felt about my friends showing their affections? When 3 of them left, and 2 were left eating, the awkward silence was obvious. I just wonder.

Slowly,

i will adapt to this.

Faith

2011-01-16T04:29:00.001+08:00

Hit my 1st speed bump today. I guess things have been going great, but also too fast. Perhaps this came at the right time as a reminder to slow down, and think things over. There's still a lot of things i have to learn and show. I can't always be showing one side of me. I've now shown my other side. I was too focused on trying to show my caring side, to make her feel loved that i forgot that whats important now is to get to know each other even more. Understanding each other through communication is vital. After getting things out of my chest, i feel that, now we are more open to talks and are willing to listen and understand each other. After all, love is about two people, and not just one. I can understand that its only been a little more than a week since we started, but i choose to love you for a reason. Doubts are still lingering, but i believe we will both be able to trust each other fully somewhat in the future.I feel that, after this experience, we both took home lessons about each other, and the way we both think. You now know, how protective i get about the things and person i love, how jealous i can get, how i can think of so many things just because of one small thing you said, how much i value our relationship, how much i trust in you, how much i share with you and how important you are to me, not just to love, but to share my life experience with. I have faith that this will make us stronger, instead of weaker.

We should

still be close to our friends

we should

still seek advice from our friends

we should

still take some of their advice

but

we should also

keep somethings to ourselves

i'm not all sweet talk

and words are only words
actions and reactions tells more
than any words combined can tell
i hope you can see

that i truly deeply
care about you and us

It will take some time

for you to lose doubts over me

until that day comes

i'll wait patiently

with faith

Double

2011-01-14T16:40:00.002+08:00

Woke up early, i dragged myself out of bed, and into my car. Battling with cars i made my way to the main hill. The scent that I've grew fond of was well within my reach. Right under my nose. I grabbed hold, and didn't want to let go. I felt warm. I felt , not only my heart beating. The touch. The scent. Hungry for more, i wanted to go to a school. But instead went to eat. Coincidentally it was a familiar place. I guess it was fate. Feeling bored, i watched as the Godfocker, turned into a Greg Focker. Walked around for a while, and found myself in taiwan eating fried chicken. Took some coffee bean on the way too. Then back to the main hill.

Next day, found myself back at the main hill again. This time, there were no disruptions. Listened to some piano songs. Although i know nothing about music, but it sure was beautiful. I meant the person playing it. Lazed around, and trashed the kitchen. Cooking up a storm, but the dish was just mediocre. Then the rain came, and ruined the party.

Walking in a sea of people,

it was only you that mattered.

Trying my best

to make sure you weren't cold

Hand in hand,

it was our first date.

Being there,

playing a fool,

taking pictures,

cooking and washing,

it gave me a feeling,

like we were...

Change

2011-01-11T02:58:00.002+08:00

It started with a cube. Then it opened up and showed its true nature.Hearts were beating, blood were pumping, and lungs were pounding. As the words were muttered out, hugs were given. Then its the closure for the night, with a long slow walk.

The next day began with an awkward feeling going to Malacca. Questions were raised, thoughts were made. Till that moment when the awkwardness was broken with regards to the weather. I didn't have to wear a glove anymore to feel the warmth in my palm and finger. While in Venice, the lead actress leaned in towards the lead actor and sweet movie was made.

Soon i found myself waking up to an angel. Nagging me out of bed, i pretended not to wake up, so the angel would come closer. Walked around town, with both hands occupied, snapping some pictures. However, soon i realized, it was not worth my distraction and paid less attention to the camera. All i wanted was what's in my left hand. As we are going the distance, my legs didn't feel heavy. Instead it was my arm. Perhaps the extra 45kg there took out some energy, but it was well worth it. Then we sailed around in the clouds, while bad mouthing hollywood stars. Then we switched to cruising on a river instead. The breezy cooling wind was in my face, but my body felt so warm. My heart was beating fast, making sure no eyes were upon me. Then my lips felt a wonderful feeling that was so soft and smooth. Then my lips felt a feeling that was hot and chunky. Mmm, food on sticks in peanut sauce. Those feelings were something to kill for.

Once more, i woke up to a beautiful sight. But it soon turned scary as i was given a scare by the stare. Perhaps because i drank the Coke. Then i rubbed shoulder, gets shoved away and items getting hit while walking. But whats important was i never got lost. However, I did got turned off and on a lot. I've even changed character a few times. From being a safety belt, i became a old man who shakes his legs and to a kid that can pass as a 17 year old's son. At least i didn't end up as a toy and get played with and forgotten in the end. That night, was a sleepless night. Not that i couldn't, but rather i didn't want to. The song by Aerosmith, Don't wanna miss a thing was going through my mind. Heart was beating fast, fingers caressing that soft smooth surface, and my lips, no longer felt that soft and smooth feeling, but rather a soft and moist feeling.

I woke up in heaven as an angel was sleeping. Looking so pure and innocent, i can't help but to stop and stare. I know that it was a special moment, that rarely happens. Didn't want it to end, but sadly, things gotta go. The journey back however was different than the journey there. It was fill with warmth, even though the air-cond was still on. And now my life is filled with warmth and cheese.

I was afraid

that i was going too fast

I was afraid

of what you might think

I was afraid

of what might happen

But

The way you reacted

were positive and loving

The way you spoke

filled with passion

The way you moved

your body to fit mine

The way you dressed

no longer caring about the society

The way you listen

changing your appearance for me

The way you love

was warm and pure

Love

2011-01-10T22:05:00.002+08:00

I used to think that i wasn't meant for it. I used to feel sad whenever i watch movies about it. I feel like, my only moments being in it is through songs singing about it. I've failed numerous times. I wanted to give up on it, for i was tired and worked up. I couldn't care less about it anymore. I see people around me finding their other halves through every possible way, even through mutual friends. Then i gave a shot, and tried being a friend. Never did i know, i did made one friend.

You are that caring person.
You baked for a friend's birthday.

You are careful.
You didn't trust me easily.

You were not confident about yourself.
You edit your pictures.

You cared about how people would think.
You dressed according to what you thought the public thinks.

You are passionate.
You love your musics.

You are open-minded.
You can talk to people easily about , jokes.

You are fragile.
You injury prone.

You are stubborn.
You wouldn't sleep early.

You are paranoid.
You think about things that you shouldn't.

You are thoughtful.
You are concerned about others.

You are picky.
You don't eat many types of food.

Those are the things that i thought about that person. Some are good. Some are bad. The bad ones, i tried to change, and perhaps because of that, i start thinking more about that person, and how i can be the one to build that person up and feel more confident. Slowly but surely i grew fond of your positive personality. I was warned by friends, to be careful. I was warned to be less reckless. I was reminded of my past. Because of that I wanted to know more about that person, and build a stronger friendship first.

Things happened. I got in trouble, i got in danger, i got in sadness. That person had been there through it all. I feel blessed to have known another great person. That person said things that, honestly, not many would have uttered, especially after that motorbike incident. It showed, that person really did cared for me. I was deeply moved because of that. Thank you for caring for a person like me.And i guess i did the same back to that person, especially cause that person is such injury prone. I wanted to be there and protect that person.

It was when that person left for a trip that i soon realized that i needed that person. We've been talking everyday since we started. It would be different for us not to be communicating. It sure as hell was different. I got restless as though a part of me was missing. Hoping that the light beside that person's name to turn green ,I stayed up till 3 or 4am thinking of that person, I guess, i wanted, at least something to stay the same, despite that person not being there facing the screen and fingers pressing the keyboard.

I was tempted a few times, to show that person my affection. When that person was close, i just wanted that person in my arms. But my sane mind told me, " dude, wtf are you thinking? snap out of it! You'll ruin everything! ". I can't stop thinking then. I wanted to find that person. I needed to see that person. I needed to be there for that person. I guess, the new year changed me. I had made up my mind. I will do this. I have to do it. I needed to do it. Before i can't anymore. Some how, the new year gave me new hope. New courage. New believe.

I took the keys, and depart for the journey of the lifetime. This is the time. This is my time. This is our time.

"10pm, 5th January, 2011"

that person's touch

so soft and tender

that person's eyes

looking innocent and pure

that person's hair

soft and fluffy

that person's breath

warm and alive

that person's heartbeat

synchronizing with mine

that person's scent

unique and pleasant

that person's voice

puts a smile on my face

that person's care

lightens up my life

that person's actions

cute and unpredictable

that person's passion

gives me strength

that person's love

makes me want to love that person more

that person

is wonderful

that person

is beautiful

that person

is my girlfriend

that person

is Chrystelle Liu Zhuo-Min

Bang

2010-12-20T01:19:00.000+08:00

Getting on that ride, i believed that i could find happiness and excitement. Sometimes i go slow, sometimes i try to go fast. At first, i thought, things were going great. Everything is going smooth. Till i hit a speed bump. Hitting hard, i almost fall off, diverted from my destination. I corrected myself, and continued on my journey to that elusive destination. Never would i have thought, i would end up slap bang on my face. Lying on the floor, i watched as the culprit quickly left my sight. A victim of a hit and run. So the decision is, should i continue my journey , switch destination, or just make my way home?

Fell once more on my knees

begging for a sign

that will lead me to true happiness.

Illusions

2010-12-17T00:23:00.000+08:00

I once thought, both my feet we planted solidly on the ground. I felt stable and strong. Its as if, i was about to walk out from the rain, into the sunshine. Things are looking great. The warmth feeling, and the sun rising. Then i realized, things were just an illusion.. The shadows came out, and mocked me in my face. I looked down, and my feet were never firm on the ground. I feel vulnerable. I'm trembling. I feel unstable. Things are falling apart. What will happen next? Will i find a stable foothold? Or will i stumble once more?

Walking on a tight line,

cautiously, i thought

that i could reach a better side.

Half-way through, clouded by illusions,

will i reach that place?

Bent

2010-12-10T03:01:00.000+08:00

After being used in many embarrassing ways, beating eggs, picking up food, pricking meat, this humble fork wants nothing but to serve the user.It seeks to fulfill it purpose in life.To think, that it will end up with a caring user but instead, it was bent over and over again. Handed down, around the table, jumping from place to place , seeking that one final stop where everything falls into place. And in the end, it was bent so much, that the fork is barely recognized . It is now so fragile. No longer the solid steel it once was. Now its merely aluminium, going crazy soon.

On my knees i pray

when will the pain stop?

Will the madness continue?

What i ask for, isn't a lot.or ridiculous,

What i seek for, is basic needs,

without it, whats there to live for?

Lightpath

2010-11-22T00:49:00.000+08:00

Chasing for all my life, for that one different light. There's so many bright lights around me. They all stand out, have their own personality , their color, their size. I love them all. But some catches my attention more. Its that extra something, that makes me run after it. All this time, I've failed to obtain it. There are times when i was close, but never really capturing it. Constantly falling over obstacles in the dark, where i can't exactly see which direction i'm heading. Confused with all those lights, my path is constantly disrupted. I really do hope, i can find the right direction, and see with my heart, following the correct light path.

Will the light bring me towards a better place?

or will it lead me to my end?

Fly

2010-11-05T03:07:00.000+08:00

I lie there looking up to the skies, i see a flock of birds flying. Their graceful movements attracted my attention at once. At once, i took out my camera and start capturing their beauty. As they fly high in the sky, i wish that i could join them, fly with them and be with them. I tried all i can , but each attempt ended up with a face plant on the floor. I'm not sure what went wrong. Did i try hard enough? Did i take off at a pace too slow or fast? or was there air turbulence ? Perhaps, i'm not meant to fly.

All i can do is run,

Chasing a flock of graceful birds.

Where does it stop?

Starstruck

2010-11-01T23:23:00.000+08:00

Some people complain, that they seldom get to see stars. Those brightly lit stars high in the sky brings smiles to faces. Why wouldn't anyone love them? Wouldn't it be nice to see stars every night, every where ? I beg to differ. Surrounded by stars would seem like a perfect situation. But think about it, when you get so accustomed to them, you'll want them to show up every night. So beautiful, you want to hold them, but you'll soon realize, they're too far away. So you end up lying down on the ground, staring up at all those stars, wondering, which one is your favorite, but you couldn't decide. All you have is one pair of eyes. Staring at all of them will get you ended up star struck, blinded by all those sparkles.

Then you turn to your side,

there's a lava lamp,

despite being retro,

and not so bright,

its soothing to the eyes

and warms you up.

A keeper?

Empty

2010-10-24T02:18:00.000+08:00

An empty heart, drained out of blood surprisingly still beats. However, each pump leaves the heart aching, breaking down every second. Occasionally, fresh blood are pumped in. Within days, those blood too, will be drained. Sadly, no matter how much the heart wants to heal, its already stained with the blood of its past.

Vulnerable to viruses and bacteria,

this heart acts tough,

in hope they will not attack.

Beach

2010-10-23T00:55:00.000+08:00

People and animals travel to the beach in search of happiness. Be it, the food they find, the companion they gain, the love they share. Happily they walk, jog, play leaving foot prints on that soft sand. The mark they left however are never permanent. More often than not, the wave comes in, and swoop away the prints.

Sometimes i wish,

sand were hard instead

so no footprints could be left.

Run

2010-10-21T23:12:00.000+08:00

Every marathon that I join, is to prove myself that i can achieve something. It motivates me to start and complete my actions, something that i don't usually do. At every finishing line, the sense of satisfaction, and joy overwhelms every pain and suffering endured. However, this current marathon that I'm in, seems to take forever for me. The finishing line isn't in sight at the moment, despite running for all my life.

Sometimes i wish my destination,

was that short,

a 10km marathon.

Void

2010-10-18T02:31:00.000+08:00

I used to feel so awesome riding that bicycle, feeling so free, and fast. It was the best feeling that I ever had, as i was so close to freedom. Somehow, I out-grew my bicycle and i start looking at motorbikes. I start dreaming that i would someday ride the fastest, sickest looking bike there is. I turn my head every time i hear a loud thumping sound generated by those massive engine fixed upon such beauty on two wheels. That feeling of envy, that they could experience what i could only dream of. I see their happy face, and stand there wondering, when will it be my turn?

I am happy right now

with what i have,

but its incomparable.

There's just this void

thats begging to be filled.

Short

2010-10-18T01:06:00.001+08:00

Empty heart will allow the most warmth to shine out.

Hot

2010-10-14T00:03:00.000+08:00

What do you do when you find yourself stranded, under a shelter from a pouring rain? Getting yourself all wet, running from one shelter? When will you reach that one place where you can settle down? Try lighting up a pile of coal. It may take some time getting it to glow, but certainly it will be worth it. Sparks fly as the coal give away warmth. Hot and bright, this coal gives comfort to whom ever seeks shelter. Those rain drenched clothings will dry off too. However, do not be deceived, for things may get too hot, and burn you up. Alternatively, you could make yourself to a nearby coffee shop, and get yourself a cuppa coffee and chill out. The choice is yours, and yours alone.

So hot it will melt you

unDecided

2010-09-18T03:55:00.000+08:00

Wind chimes are really random. They voice out as wind hits them. Provoked, they speak out and express things. Mood can be created by those tingling sounds. Without those winds, certainly this wind chime wouldn't do anything. They wouldn't produce mood and create feeling. Unsure of their purpose, they are constantly left for their surroundings to decide for them. They are doubtful if they should produce those tingling sounds, or just sit there and do nothing, just as a decoration.

unable to decide,

this wind chime will stay still

at least until the next wind struck

Special

2010-09-11T03:47:00.000+08:00

Procrastinated this post for a week plus already. I think its only fair i wrote this while i'm still free from busy college life. 2010 had been a roller-coaster year. and its only 9 months in, another 1/4 to go. I know its early to say this, but i think it will be awesome, cause for the past 9 months, it was, despite minor set backs. What sets 2010 from the rest of my 17 years is that, i made hell lots of new friends. Awesome friends. And also the fact that i celebrated my birthday 3 times!

Early Celebration

A real surprised on a count that it was 2 days early. Caught me by surprised. Day started out with some serious bbq-ing. Some random stuff happened. Funny stuff. Embarrassing stuff, right Crystal?. Then the surprised came. Didn't even have time to fix my hair. LOL awesome planning guys. Great location + great people= awesome day. Thanks for the stuffs. Thanks for making my year one of the most memorable one so far. All the trips we had, the sleepovers, watching ghost movies at 4am, steamboats, Timon going to hospital. Ok maybe the last one was scary, but really really unforgettable. College would probably be different without you all, including those not in the picture. Really brightened what would have been a dull college life. At least thats what i initially felt in the first few days. Wouldn't have been able to go through the first few months of college. All thanks to that five words, L.O.L Student Council.

On Time Celebration

A truly awesome friend. Despite being very busy, she managed to find sometime to spend it with me. Would be a totally boring day if she didn't called us out. Last minute planning at 2am for the win! Hahaha! Also not in the picture were chun hoe, kok yang and katherine. No group photo cause the last 2 names where late. As usual. Heh, kidding xD Had lunch, watch some movies, missed the bus and all thanks to koks. Just an ordinary outing but a meaningful one. Thanks for the company guys. And since you wanted a post about you, here's a short one. Thanks for making my higher secondary life awesome. The things we did and been through. For being a true friend. Always being there for me. Helping me up whenever i get down. Able to listen to everything and not judge and still treat me as friend. There's no one else quite like you. C= (:*

Belated Celebration

Better late than never. I don't mind it cause i know you guys are busy with exam and all. Glad you people still remember to celebrate with me! Appreciate it =) Thanks for dinner guys. Awesome food and atmosphere. And awesome people! Pigeon gang in Punggol. HAHA! And special thanks to Ng Mun Yee for those sweet-like-you cupcakes! =D Awesome having you guys! Always a sure that I'll laugh whenever i'm around you people. We'll always have punggol as our hometown. Despite their 1st impression, they are a great company. Really funny and interesting people as long as you're on the bullying side, right Huiwen? Kidding! What would high school be like without you bunch of jakun? I don't know, and i can't imagine.Thanks guys, for making it a wonderful experience. Sad leaving that school with everyone of us just minutes aways from each other. Especially all my ji-mui! Now its hard to get everyone together at the same time, same place. I forgot how Dex Shan looked like..Jokes!

Wonderful week long celebration. Truly an unforgettable birthday celebration. Three times! All important and all enjoyable. Thank god it was, cause, probably this is my last time celebrating in Malaysia. Next time round, if according to plan, i'll be in Canada. And most of you will be off to your next level in life. All the more reason these 3 celebrations were so very important. Unless...all of you are to fly to Canada to celebrate. Thats a different story all together. Probably thats highly unlikely. I wonder how I would celebrate my birthday next year? How would i feel at that time?

I hope all these wouldn't be written in sands,

Instead, on a solid diamond,

So neither time or tide will wash it all away.

* used diamond instead of rock ,

cause rocks can corrode,

and diamonds are precious*

Incompetence

2010-09-05T03:59:00.000+08:00

In times of sadness and despair, humans depend on god for comfort and relief. To seek courage to overcome difficulties. Getting that comfort when you're down, to just hear god's words and feel happy again. But when god need us humans to follow his words, his noble teachings, there are those who ignore it. Others are just lost, trying hard to follow in god's foot steps. But never really able to do so. Feeling incompetence, they struggle and often left heartbroken, unable to give the kind of support and reliance back.

What happens

when the person you most depend and rely on,

turns to you for reliance and support?

That feeling of incompetence sets in

knowing that you can't give

the kind of support

they had given to you previously.

Bing!

2010-08-16T23:13:00.000+08:00

An idea pops, and a light bulb lights up. A sign of true inspiration and idea flowing, like free electrons in a circuit. These electrons move around from the negative terminal to the positive end, giving a potential difference in each terminal. An imbalance cause a spark, a jolt of current, enough to stun and later on paralyze a person. Left uncontrolled these sparks could kill a healthy living person. Too much and it shocks you so much you couldn't sleep at all. However without them, technology wouldn't function. Our free will to dream and to pursuit the future are inhibited without these currents. There will be nothing in this world, that can drive us towards the future. Current alone on the other hand is not sufficient enough as it require a mechanism to make things happen. All it takes is that one move.

A thought alone is worthless

without action.

Destiny

2010-08-05T22:28:00.001+08:00

Put on your adventure gear. Get on that trusty bike of yours and head out. Having a vague idea of a place to go, you head out with a heart filled with excitement just waiting to peek out and watch as the world revolves under your wheels. Mid-way through you'll go over speed bumps, slowing you down, but never stopping you. It is only at intersections that we pause to think, which way to go now? At times, some roads are occasionally blocked. A detour of our original plans. Perhaps, that road might still bring us to our pre-determined destination. However, upon setting sights on the new route and environment, we might have second thoughts, directing us to a whole new destination that we'll find interesting.

But somehow, our interests are never realized. Instead, it is our obligations that require us to reach that certain destination, because at the end of the day, we still have to go back home, to look them in the eyes, and say, i did what i had to do. Deep down, it wasn't what we want to do.

To get on that bike,

and wander to stumble across things

that would capture our attention,

captivating our heart, mind and soul.

That is true destiny.

Homesick

2010-07-27T00:34:00.000+08:00

Take a look at your backyard, your hometown, the place you most associate with. Remember the memories that goes with it. The people that watch you grow. The items that you play with. The way you learn from the environment. The lessons you pick up as you explore the place. Once you've grown associated with the place, you wouldn't want to leave when given the choice. Cause that feeling of being lost and completely alone in a new home, trying to re-adapt to new situations will take a toll.So take a real good look and savor it completely , soak up the atmosphere because you'll never know when you'll be leaving it behind.

Left my heart mind and soul back home,

when can i take it back?

Candles

2010-07-25T22:38:00.001+08:00

Light a candle and it lights up your life. It brings much warmth and creates clarity in our otherwise dull and dark life. But as time goes by, so does it's wick, burning away precious fuel. As the fuel burns out, the flame grows smaller with each glow. Trying to survive without additional fuel, this flame eventually extinguishes.Having said that, the flame left a significant amount of damage. It scarred the glass walls surrounding it. Darkened and cracked, that fragile glass needs some work to get mended back again.Although the flame is put out, but its ashes and ember still remains, taking up space within that glass container.

100% came, 95% leaves, 5% stays.

Colors

2010-07-09T17:06:00.000+08:00

Every color gives a different kind of feeling. Bright color seem to give you that warm energetic feel, while dull colors gives a cool relaxed atmosphere. We need these to create mood and atmosphere in our everyday lives. There are many different tones and concentration to every color. Cyan, turquoise, aqua may seem like the same to some, but in reality they are different in term of depth and concentration. These different tones and shades give a more 3D experience compared to a boring 2D imagery. What ever it is, we need these colors , because without them, that box of color pencil would not be complete.

Brace

2010-06-29T02:12:00.000+08:00

A baby seal, once given birth to is being cared by its mother. Their bonds strengthened over time as they endure the harshness of their environment.As they face through troubled conditions, this baby seal's body slowly adapts itself, building up thick layer of fats to endure the cold sharp waters of the ocean. Once this baby seal hits its prime age, its mother left him to face the cold harsh ocean. It wasn't because she doesn't love and care for it anymore. Its because it was time for her to leave, and the time for that baby seal to grow up and start having a life of its own, to be independent. This seal venturing into the unknown will sometimes miss its mother, but it knows, that she will never be there every time. It puts on a brave face and continue to conquer the deep blue sea.

because we have to endure hardship

to gain happiness,

no matter how hard some things will get.

Toy

2010-06-26T03:34:00.000+08:00

A bear, sits there waiting for its owner, to provide warmth, comfort, and occasionally a hug. Because sometimes a bear is all we humans have to get that one hug. So this bear, loyal and truthful to its owner, waits patiently, to give care, support and hugs whenever its owner needs them. Sad to say, that when the bear is upset, and in turns craves a hug , the owner is never there for it to shower love and tenderness. Although surrounded by its fellow cotton woven toys, this humble bear just sits there, collecting dust all year long. Soon, those dust turns into stain. The owner, unable to wash those stains off, decides, thats it. Its time to put away this dirty bear, and replaces it with a new one. Feeling thrown and replaced, this bear still remains faithful and loyal to its owner, because it knows that without its owner, this bear's life would have been much worse.

Will the owner still care for it?

will this bear end up in the hands of another owner?

perhaps someone better?

Ticktock

2010-06-25T02:45:00.000+08:00

Time, priceless and irreversible. Many seek out time, while others waste them. Kids want time to speed up, adults want time to slow down, the aged want time to stop. Those troubled ones want time to rewind. No matter how we want time to move, there's always a reason for it. Because with time, it change things a lot, while sometimes, it doesn't. However, sometimes time moves exactly like in a clock. It goes round and round in circles. Things repeat itself multiple times in different situations. Those moments will never go away, because they keep coming back, like a number on the face of a clock.The alarm just to remind us that, the moment is here. Its time to ring...

And its all coming back

Phantom

2010-06-21T20:32:00.000+08:00

Even when the surrounding is well lit up, behind every object, hides its secret. The other side of things. The side we seldom notice. What we normally see, is what the object wants us to see. Perhaps, behind every object, hides a cage. A cage made up of shadows. No matter how much light we try to shine on the object, the shadow gets darker. When the light is shone on the shadow itself, it disappears, only to come back when the light is moved. So how do we get rid of this phantom?

Trapped

Lights

2010-06-20T01:19:00.000+08:00

At night, when all you see is darkness, close your eyes.Empty your mind. Calm your soul. See with your heart.Because in every darkness, there is bound to be light. You just have to look at the right place. When you calm yourself and open your heart, you will realize, the streak of light will get brighter and brighter. When all is calm, light shall fall upon you, and light your path.

Ironic, in light, there is darkness somewhere. Somewhere within the lights, in a place, where people seldom notice, darkness lies. It depends on how we look at things. From one angle, everything is well lit up, while another, all you see is shadows.

Mixed feelings at times of mixed emotion.

Bokeh

2010-06-09T21:36:00.001+08:00

A bokeh, creates a sense of wonder and mystery to photographers. Those images tell only half of what it really is. Bokeh is created when its focus is narrowed causing the camera, unable to detect the whole picture. The focus is turned away, only letting viewers to be fooled by such lighting and lens work. And so the photographer captures those moments, showcasing only what the photographer wants to let their viewers to see. To hide the true environment, the bigger picture in life. Because every good picture, comes when the bad is out of focus, and only the good, is showcased.

Every picture hides a mystery

Chase

2010-06-06T02:25:00.001+08:00

In any race, it is always important to know your capabilities, your potential and your preparation. Without any of these, it would be futile to even try to compete. If you can't even master a small distance, why bother trying for those ultra marathons? 42km? 84km? even 21km is frightening enough to even consider. And yet, i still want to push and go for more. I thought that, after going through a lot of tough times, i would be prepared for the worst. How wrong was I. It still hurts, its still harsh, and it tests my limit for endurance, perhaps even breaking that limit, causing me to fall. I know sometime soon I need to get back up and complete this race. .How thankful I am, for having such straight forward legs, telling me to stop when i need to. It just depends on my will power to push them through.Until that happens, i shall rest this two tired legs of mine. Perhaps applying some soothing lotions. Why not?

I'm just so tired,

that i can just fall

asleep

and not bother.

Battlefield

2010-05-31T19:51:00.000+08:00

Fighting for their lives, protecting the country, safe guarding their treasures and the king. They've endured much pain and sufferings on the battlefield, watching as their friends and comrades fall. The trainings and military works that they've gone through were tougher than any other exercise or drills. And yet, when they emerge victorious, their efforts were not recognized. Instead, their superiors and generals gets all the honor. All they ask for, isn't a seat in the parliament or bags of golds. All they need are recognition and compensation for their time away from their loved ones. Oh, how ironic, when they are forced to stay in the army and serve the country like dogs, forever rendered of their freedom. Although unsatisfied, these soldiers are unable to fight back because they know, it will only create more blood spills- a civil war. Fearing for the worst, these soldiers surrender themselves to serve the country, in hope that one day, they will be free. Free to pursuit their dreams.

Waiting for the day,

this soldier will be free form service

and be able to walk his path he choose.

Captured

2010-05-31T02:23:00.000+08:00

Driving out to the beach, of some rural area, and you can find one of the most beautiful sights you could ever possibly see. In such a place where everything thing else is of worst condition, lies nature's must beautiful. Just look up to the skies, and you can see thousands or perhaps millions of stars lighting up the dark skies. Certainly not something we city people can often ponder upon considering our surroundings and atmosphere. Fallen in love with what we see, high above us, those stars closest to heaven. We tried all we can to understand them, to get a closer look at their beauty and origins. Perhaps even trying to get close to one of those stars. But sooner or later, we humans realized that,only those possessing mystical powers are able to capture the essence of those beloved stars.As for us mere mortals, we are only given the opportunity to be jealous of those extraordinary. Only our sights are content with what they see, while the rest of our senses grieve with sorrow.

The lips smiles at what the eyes sees

but the heart breaks silently

Fall

2010-05-28T02:19:00.001+08:00

What happens when you fall in space, towards those shiny stars far far away? You find yourself drifting, powerless to control your own path and flight. Your destination and journey aren't decided by yourself. It is all up to fate and destiny. Whether you get sucked into a black hole, or perhaps land on a beautiful new planet, its all up to destiny. But, what if, those stars were merely illusions? In reality, you're just falling into an endless pit of doom. When you finally realize that, its too late. You can hardly escape and be able to face reality because fact is, reality is cruel and harsh.

Fallen too deep

to come back out unharmed.

Meteor

2010-05-27T21:52:00.000+08:00

Meteors are hard to come by. It takes decades and sometimes centuries to orbit and showcase it's beauty to us, mortal humans. We make wishes upon those falling stars in hope that, it will make our lives better, just the way we want it. Then, we humans get greedy. We demand for more, we fantasize all the time. Hoping that a meteor shower will come and grant every single one of our wishes. But i know, that day will almost never come. At least not in my lifetime. I can only be realistic , and not hope and wish for much.

Meteors burn themselves,

for the joys and hopes of others.

Official

2010-05-26T22:00:00.001+08:00

As i sat there with Timothy Ng, filling up this clearance form, there is this feeling, a deep sinking feeling. It gets worse as we walked towards Ms. Kalai. The moment when the form leaves my hand, I breath a huge sigh. Then i thought to myself " Hey, i'm officially not an ADP student anymore" . Hence begins my month plus of rotting at home.

Been thinking about this for a while now. Had been preparing for this day, when i finally let go. These bunch of people actually made college life so much easier than i've thought of. Thanks to LOL we clicked together. Heck, not only did we clicked, but most of us stuck together like glue. Although i've left, but this LOL spirit will stay with me.Yes, i know, that was cheesy. And so, i have to start college and orientation day once again.

Probably the most mixed feeling trip I've ever had. Knowing that this trip might be the last i can have together with all of you, it was hard to bottle things up. It brought us all closer together, in ways i didn't expected.

I'm so afraid that, once i leave ADP, our bonds together will weaken. I really hope not. Because i know college life would be different without you all. You all have left a deep mark, a sweet scar in my life.

Jay shen - 1st non-DJ ADP friend. I know you'll be sad after i leave. But don't so gay la. Go back to edwin. And stop eating ' soft rice'. Need to grow up liao. Eh, i dont mean your height, that one i know cannot d. HAHA! joking k?

Shalee- 2nd non-DJ ADP friend? A close friend of mine, been in the same class each subject, except English. Thank god for that. Now that you're different class and course, there's no one else to help me write down important notes and homeworks.No one to tease when i'm bored. No one to help keep my stuffs. Thanks for everything. In return i'll help you take care of Timothy ok? I'll make sure he doesn't get other girl's number.=)

Katrina- 5 years in the same high school, and yet we barely knew each other. How much have we gotten closer together in just 5 months time. Lol, the irony. Nick, i didn't mean it in the wrong way k? Don't misunderstand. =P. I'll definitely miss all those emo talks, pillow talks and what ever talks we had. I'll miss following your transport and your " i don't know laaaaaa". Don't emo so much edi k? But if you do, i'm still open for consultation. Hahaha!

Crystal- Sama nasib punya orang! Probably because of that we got closer together eh? Don't emo so much also la. Not good leh. WOO! go buy things then happy edi lo. Hehe, hope you'll know what to do soon.Make me proud Must go yum cha session sometime k? Must keep this bond =)

Evon- Hope you'll do good in mass comm. You'll make your parents proud! I'll miss your super perasan-ness and epic sampat. xD

Yee Sheng- Drive carefully! Must remember to bring me out jalan-jalan find food ok? I'll make sure you won't sleep while driving. Thanks for teaching me a lot of things and all those advices. =)

Nicholas- Don't emo emo edi la. Got bubble tea edi. Drink more, good for health =D And don't drive so dangerously la! Yum cha k? fetch me yeah xDD

Ann bee- Ex-darling! Same group during orientation. First few people that i interacted in ADP. Will miss your bubbly personality. Although shoot me a lot, but will definitely miss you. Stay in ADP k? Don't so fast go UK. Thanks for the memories so far. I still owe you eh? Faster choose and take before time limit expire. BTW my cendol! you say you gonna make for me! I want souvenir from korea!! Have fun there =)

Wen jun - Ahhhh ahhhh ahhhh ahhh ah junnnn ! Also same group during orientation =P. Must go out for more trips. Remember ok? Once i get my DSLR we go photoshooting + day trip =D Too bad i can't use them in Korea with you. Souvenirs! Have fun =)

Aaron- You conman! Thought you dropping ADP lo, say until like that, mana tahu staying xD. Don't stop shooting people. Shoot them for me ok? Lets go for sports!

Cadence- Hope you'll adapt yourself in UNITEN. Sorry for FFK-ing badminton so many times. But there will still be chances =)

Suit yee- Drive carefully! Don't bang car d , especially BMW ...expensive =)

Edward- PENGUIN! dont stop being so cute! Although very "fau kua" but thats penguin! Stop FFK-ing lah. Remember steamboat? very nice right? FFK somemore la...haha

To the rest that i didn't write here, not that i don't care about you all, its just, im getting kinda lazy to write anymore. Sorry, thats just me, im lazy =(

To sum up everything, You guys are awesome! Will always remember you all. Although now i'm gonna be going for ICPU and Canada, i still consider myself a part of this ADP family. I am one, right? Please say yes =(

Will i be able to find such sampat, jakun, lame, fun group like this again?

Will i find a group like you all?

I'm sure no other group can ever replace you all.=)

Morph

2010-05-26T01:45:00.001+08:00

A bug dreaming to soar in the skies, together with those high flying birds. Oh, such high ambitions and self-expectations. Spreading its wings, it tries to navigate pass those criss-crossing tall grasses. Unable to fly pass, it is trapped and it fell to the ground, hitting so hard that it shattered not only it's wings, but also it's dreams and hopes. It will take a long time for this bug to recompose itself before it is ready to take it's chances again.But what is the point in trying to soar high in the sky, when it has to come back down in the end? What is the purpose of chasing that illusive big, tall, scented flower when it can find equally as pleasing flowers around it? Although it is never easy for a bug to ever match with a flower, but perhaps inside this bug, holds the future of a butterfly.

metamorphosis will begin

Wash

2010-05-25T21:04:00.000+08:00

The humble shoe. Abused and applied stress by our feet, and yet they still serve us sincerely. Walked a thousand miles, going through every terrain and environment possible to mankind. Through those experiences and journey, these shoes pick up souvenirs along the way, be it dirt,sand, pollen, seeds and other substances. Its good that we wash our shoes every time it gets dirty. Washing aways all those dirt and impurities. Left alone throughout every journey, those dirt will finally stain those shoes of ours. By that time, when we try to wash it away, it will never come off because its now a part of those shoes. So don't be afraid to wash them, because it will do those shoes more good than harm.

even detergent can hardly wash away

those dirt left behind

Face

2010-05-25T01:13:00.000+08:00

Remember how TV shows would use smiley faces to censor something? Why would they use such cute happy faces to cover up for such obscene acts? Well, maybe because those smiley faces, when compared to the faces God gave us, are way too fake. Don't you think so? Perhaps this is why, we make our own mask, our own smiley face to cover up our emotions. To hide how we really feel just for the benefit of others. As we all know, smiley faces will always cheer us up. Well, at least it works for me. But somehow, its tough to keep that face. Our true self, the face that God gave us will always try to showcase itself.

God has given you one face,

and you make yourself another

William Shakespeare .

Shadows

2010-05-24T15:44:00.000+08:00

Everything in life can be interpreted in various ways. Some can be magical, other maybe be hurtful. Other can be something unexpected and wonderful. Words like any other things, will have dual meaning. Although it is obvious that it was meant to be a joke, but deep down, those words were sharper than any mystical swords created. Cuts through fleshes, right into the heart without even leaving any scars or marks. Actions on the other hand, can conceal our true behavior. Round and innocent, it can prove to be full of love. But its just merely shadows to those that are related, never realized.

I need some TLC

Shakespeare

2010-05-23T20:43:00.000+08:00

In a play, whats important is the script. Without it, we wouldn't know what to say or how to act. Lost and uncertain, we think up of our own lines. Confused and inappropriate, we screw up.Big time. And so, with a shredded script, we actors will have to decide on our own. What should we do, how should we act.But our mouth are lost for words. We couldn't express completely what we want. Keeping things inside of us, bottling up our emotions, slowly killing ourselves from the inside. Those words that we want to say, are being rendered. It will take guts and patience to slowly unscramble those shredded pieces of paper, compiling it back into a script where we can read from it, expressing all our emotions. Until that say comes, this actor will take his time to do just that.

Those words i couldn't say

...

yet.

Random

2010-05-23T18:37:00.001+08:00

Personality test.

Your view on yourself:
You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:
Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.

Your views on education
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:
You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:
You are concerned about your image and the way others see you. This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people. It's time for you to believe in who you are, not what you wear.

Who is your true self:
You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.

Hahaha, quite true. =)

Risk

2010-05-22T01:34:00.000+08:00

When it comes to gambling and risk, it all comes to luck. Its decided by fate. its decided by god. When u know and feel that the odds are against you, there's really no point in continuing that hand. Its better off you fold it and prepare for the next round. No use, if we put everything on the line at once. I knew that the odds are heavily against me. It was either me or you. So now the question is, how will i earn back what i've lost? Did i even lose? But i know one thing, i didn't win.

There is no risk now,

because there is nothing to risk anymore,

its too late.

Grow

2010-05-15T02:21:00.001+08:00

One of the basic form of life. Inside an egg, it constantly multiply, slowly growing, one cell at a time. Given the right amount of heat, this egg, feeling motivated and encouraged, will slowly break free from its shell. Able to see the world from a new dimension, a new perspective. By then, this egg, will grow much faster and be ready for the cruel harsh world. Perhaps even succeeding in life. But what happens, when too much heat was given? This egg will slowly burn from the inside. Not only will this egg stop growing, but it wouldn't be able to break free from its shell. It is unable to live up to expectations, to grow and finally contribute to mankind. Unable to do so, this egg is now useless. It will only be consumed by other stronger animal. This egg, now is doomed for life.

Will i be this egg?

or will i break free from this shell?

Bittersweet

2010-05-13T23:45:00.002+08:00

Mmmm, coffee. What's your take on coffee? I believe, all these comes down to perspective. It depends on how you look at it. The joys others receive from gushing down those liquid goodness brings them much joy and satisfaction. But not all of us, will react the same way. Sweet to some, but bitter to others.Watching as people take a sip, you'll wish that, hey! i want to try some of that. Jealous of their tongue, and appreciation towards that bitter-sweet drink, that we can generally call, coffee. It invokes us, to indulge ourselves, although we know, that coffee isn't really good for us. Oh, the hyperactivity, the nervousness without it, the addiction. Yes, it somehow does create that addiction.

I personally love milk tea because its full of flavor. That rich milky-roast-leaf flavor that burst in your mouth with joy and satisfaction. Not too bitter, and not too sweet. Just that nice balance, of tea, milk and sugar. But its hard to find one these days, just too far to reach for that one particular cup of milk tea. Jealous of those that are close, near by, getting that daily dose of milk tea, is really killing me.

When is it my turn ?

Spin

2010-05-11T18:06:00.000+08:00

As the wheels of my bike spins, so does the world. Travelling short or long distances really doesn't matter. What matters is the experiences we gain, the sights we see, the lessons we learn and the people we meet. Along our journey, its important to remember, to take one step front, and 3 steps back. Soak in the atmosphere, capture the moments in life because you might not take that road again. Its never good to rush your journey. Instead make it worth while, take the road not taken. Venture into something new.

And so i get on my bike, rev it up and off i go. Creating new memories as the wheels of my bike takes me where ever it goes. But i know, i will someday get off this bike. When that day comes, i'll know that the journey was worth it, that i have no regrets for taking that road. Because i would know that, in between the start and the end of the journey, i didn't stop. If i did, i would have fallen.

Gotta move on in life,

never stop

despite facing problems,

just move on.

Rain

2010-05-10T19:50:00.000+08:00

Rain falls as the clouds cannot contain themselves. Those clouds have gone through a lot, experienced changes and most of all, collected, absorbed, and kept to themselves. Just that one moment, that one significant moment, small or big, will cause the cloud to overflow. " Too much", the cloud said. And so, the clouds wept. Pouring down little droplets of water. Although tiny and light, but it dampens one's mood, washes away smiles and drowns out hopes and dreams.

And so i sat there, wondering.

Rain drops from clouds to the sea.

Will it ever fall back up to the clouds?

Stab

2010-05-07T22:22:00.001+08:00

Washed up by the sea, waiting to grow, sprout and probably form an island, with lush greenery; Oh, such high expectation on such a small thing.But one problem arise. Its broken. For years, it had been broken and mended back again. Imperfect every time.How sad for such a small thing to lose so much of itself, over time and time again. Lost a big part of itself, its hard for this little coconut, tough on the outside, soft and liquidly in the inside to fully regain and recompose itself. No matter how hard it tries, it just couldn't sprout and finally stand tall. Perhaps someday, someone or something will be able to pick it up, care for it and hopefully be able to grow and bear fruit, standing tall and strong.

Broken once more

Ups and Downs

2010-05-05T18:24:00.003+08:00

So, i'm finally back from Kuantan, after 5 days and 4 nights of fun-filled activities with a bunch of people i've known for less than 5 months. How funny that we can all grow to be this close, even after a short period of time. Our bond , strengthen with every moment spent together. So this is how the trip went.

1st Day

Me,aaron,jay shen,wen jun made the 1st trip in the morning, together with Aunty Chew and Amy Chew.oh and Cobbie! Omg, she's so cute!! but Garang. Macam owner-nya, Ahem*Ann bee*.Toured around town, makan, kena saman, balik condo.Left me aaron and jay shen to explore the place. Camwhored, snooker, sleep.waited for shalee timon and crystal to come.Dinner time was awesome. Shoot jay shen non-stop.Food was awesome too. Thank you aunty and uncle!

2nd day!

Woke up exceptionally early to catch the sunrise. Went there early ordered McD and waited by the beach. It was well worth the wait and the lack of sleep. It was beautiful! Took way too many pictures of the sunrise. Camwhored alot too. Sadly, not everyone were there. But hey! there's next time right? After sunrise we hanged out there for a while wrote our names on the sand. Then back to the condo to sleep. Then Katrina, Yee Sheng and suit yee came. Toured the town some more, then its dinner. Fought to pay the bill, but we were smart. We paid early. 1st time i felt happy spending money and belanja-ing people xD

3rd day!

Bleh, no nice picture cause we went Gambang water park. Got a nice 2 toned body. TT but it was fun! Then it was dinner. Thank you Wen jun's parents! Then we went karaoke. Oh and Chelsea beat Liverpool 2-0! awesome! so then we played pool for free there. but it got smokey so i went out. Tired and sleepy we rested in the car.

4th day!

So we thought, it would be goodbye to Kuantan. Our sad faces were apparent. But god knew we were sad, so we ended up late, and the bus left us. He knew we wanted another day to be together. Money wasn't important at that time. We just want to be together. Probably also it was yee sheng and aaron's curse. They wrote the wrong date on the key chain =p. It was after dinner. Timon left already. =( Uncle and Aunty Chew, Oops. I mean jie jie and kor kor brought us on a boat ride to see fireflies. It was already late, so there weren't many of them flying around. It was still fun. I've always loved boat rides =D

5th day!

Made sure we didn't miss the bus for the 2nd time, we go on the way pretty early. Breakfast and all. Getting on the bus was hard. Holding back the tears as we left each other. Hugs were everywhere, but it wasn't enough. But good things must come to an end. Every meeting has its separation. And so, the wheels of the bus rolled, so did our tears.

This trip could be the last for some of us. The last few days of the trip were hard, because those thought are slowly creeping in, as the days are slowly coming to an end. I know that there are chances that i'll be leaving this new found family of mine. These memories will be with me for a very long time. I know, because people will only shed tears for something they really love. I really do love these bunch of people.This trip has its ups and downs. As many happy moments were created, many sad one were unintentionally felt by others. But whatever is it, they were washed away by tears, dried with the suns of Kuantan.

Now that i'm at home, writing this post, i feel empty without you all. Part of me still wanders around that small town. Admiring the skies, the sun, the breeze, the beach, the seas, the people there. I don't feel like doing anything else at the moment. I really miss all 14 of us cramming in that Alphard, i miss eating dinner in such a big group, i miss fighting with wen jun and ann bee for the bill, i miss playing water together, i miss watching the sunrise and sunset with you all. I miss everything. But i miss the most, is all of you. Although i'm not very close to some, but i can feel our connection.It really didn't matter where we went, or what we did. What's important was that, we did something together.

I really do hope, moments like this could last forever.

We still have more than a week.

Can we do something like this once more?

Just in case JPA takes me away.

Bipolar

2010-04-29T23:27:00.000+08:00

Perhaps sometimes its better to keep things to yourself. Because what is the point, if we told, but we change our mind after that? Isn't better to just shut up and let things flow by itself? Running away is perhaps one of the preferred option right now. It just doesn't seem right anymore. Its just different, seeing things happening like that. There are infinite numbers of outcome and possibilities, that could, and most probably ruin things.

Things are just really confusing, messing with my sane mind. Perhaps running me insane. I feel sad yet i feel happy. Does this mean, im a sadist to myself? Thats just, weird and whatthefuck. But whatever it is, I've gotta wait till the final result, which will ultimately determine my next action.

Tears

2010-04-25T00:40:00.000+08:00

Everything will come to an end. Just like how every good thing will have something bad. But that is life. We will never know the true meaning of happiness, without getting to know the true meaning of sadness.It depends on how we manage and settle our emotions. People might cry because they are happy. Some cry because their happy memories are so wrong. The obvious reason is people cry because they are sad.Of all 3 of those, people who cry, because of their happy memories are just wrong, are in more pain. They are restricted. When they think of happy moments, they feel sad, probably because they'll never go back to those moments anymore...

Happiness appears after a tear

just like how

a rainbows appear after a rain,

but what if the rainbow and the rain appears

at the same time?

or perhaps a rain appears after a rainbow?

washing away the happiness

Choice

2010-04-23T00:05:00.001+08:00

Imagine yourself, walking into a car showroom. Examining each car, getting to know it better, their pros and cons, when suddenly u saw one, perfect as it is. Although not the most perfect car ever, but you know, its the one for you. That first sight was amazing. You get into the car, and get yourself comfortable, and you think to yourself " I gotta have this" . Then the bad news comes. A guy walks up to your side window, and says " Sorry dude, i bought this car already. It's mine". Owh, its strikes your heart, watching as he drives your dream car away.

With a such heart, I walk around, searching but i know that there isn't one that could match or possibly replace that car, that dream car. But hey, there might be one out there, that might just take my eyes away.

Thats already happened.

Rocky

2010-04-20T17:21:00.000+08:00

The road ahead maybe rocky, but at the end of the day, i WILL reach that grass, where i can finally find peace and harmony. At the mean time, i AM struggling. I feel lost and insecure. I feel that i have lost my will power to move on, to push myself towards my target. Partly because of this heart of mine. The heart cant beat without a rhythm. But what if the rhythm is irregular?

Keeping it in

Gosh

2010-04-18T03:05:00.000+08:00

I now know why i'm hesitating, whats pulling me back, rendering myself to express how i feel. Probably why i cannot commit myself truly and whole heartedly. Irony how something so pure and innocent, can hurt so much, so sharp.

The best I never had.

Fight

2010-04-15T23:26:00.000+08:00

All this time, I've been dealt multiple blows, emotionally and mentally. It happened so many times, that i didn't bother anymore. I thought things will finally turn around when i start a new chapter of my life, but i was wrong. So wrong. It happened again, but it was only a minor jab.I was too passive, letting my opponents to attack my weak spots. Stumbled down, i crawled and clawed my way back up, only to fall again. I'm not going to let it happen again. Enough is enough! Carpe diem!

All is fair in love and war

Define

2010-04-14T19:07:00.000+08:00

People say that beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. Some say beauty catches the eye, while personality captures the heart. But what if i say, the eyes captures attention, the smile melts hearts, the beauty stunned the body, personality chained the legs? All leading to the mind getting excited and restless.

I am K

In circles

2010-04-11T01:44:00.000+08:00

Going through troubled times. Even when the good news comes, the bad news comes and crushes down the good news. Gotta work on that more. And true to what others have to say, i am a guy. I should do something. But the future is blur. I can't be blamed for having second thoughts. There are past experiences that were bitter. As ironic as it sound, the present and the past almost seem the same. I just hope not....

an alphabet separates them apart.

Perhaps

2010-04-10T01:10:00.001+08:00

No matter how long it takes for a flower to bloom, it will almost always turn out beautiful. It doesn't matter if its 1 week, 1 month, 1 year, or perhaps even 10 years. All it takes is that one moment, where everything falls into place, sparks fly and your spirits free. That is whats important. Its not the quantity, but the quality. It doesn't matter, the duration, what matters is what we do in that amount of time. Did we do enough? Did we care ? Do we appreciate? Because time really doesn't matter.

i think so..

Delusions

2010-04-08T20:00:00.000+08:00

What is real? what is an illusion? For the past week, i haven't been able to differentiate between them. I'm stuck in between reality and illusion. I walk the narrow pathway, separating them apart. I don't want to be in reality because then, it will hurt. However, i'll be lying to myself, if i were too caught up in those illusions. Whats there to do? Can't i take half of each side?

i feel sad for something that didn't happen

Don't Stop

2010-04-07T23:58:00.002+08:00

No matter what we do in life, we gotta reach the top. Thats where it all matters. The moment you feel like you ARE the king of the world, you know, that you have done your best and achieved the results you wanted. Being at the top is one matter, getting there is another. The journey towards success will never come easy. It has a price to pay. Climb your way through, and never give up. Because when you quit, you've gotta climb back down, without killing yourself.

so don't give up

Ouch

2010-04-06T23:18:00.000+08:00

The sun is shining, clouds are high, and the skies are blue.All the signs of tranquility and peacefulness. However, the sun got excited and accidentally burnt me down, scorching me, setting me on fire. Left to burn and suffer as i crawl helplessly on the floor for help. But there's nothing much i can do, can't i? After all, the sun is much more powerful.

Ouch,

what was right, is now wrong

what was wrong is now right

Go

2010-04-05T22:14:00.000+08:00

The path is now set, cleared and paved. All to do now is to take the 1st step. Am i ready? I have to be, because life is hard.

Path cleared, the hard way.

Someday

2010-04-04T01:16:00.000+08:00

I hope someday, my path will be clear, intentions made pure, journey be rough but safe, and purpose be noble.

Do

2010-04-03T01:33:00.001+08:00

I knew it for sometime now, but didn't had the courage to admit it, even to myself. I said words that i didn't like, that hurt myself, hoping that it can stop me . But i can't lie to myself now. I got to decide, from this point onwards. Do i continue and show it, or i hide it and hope it dies off?

cause im jealous

Run! Devil ! Run!

2010-03-31T19:21:00.000+08:00

I've lost my inspiration and passion for the game. I couldn't keep up with what i could achieve previously. My body wouldn't let me. And yet, i dare to dream , that i will someday in this 2 years time i could proudly wear the " 42km finisher" tee shirt. Perhaps, I've lost something thats related, and it has taken away part of me.

No pain , no gain?

no passion, no gain.

Climb

2010-03-29T19:02:00.000+08:00

Its a long climb up, to your goals, you dreams, and your desire. Whatever it is, have patience and do your best.Because at the end of the day, its worth it.

slowly but surely

More than words

2010-03-27T00:46:00.001+08:00

Pure as it can be, as innocent as it can get, at the same time, its suffering. I do not want any of this, cause i don't want to feel that, I'm lacking it.Somehow, it found its way,and reached me.Now I'm feeling weird inside me. Make it stop..=(

just reach out your hands

Swirls

2010-03-25T23:05:00.000+08:00

Whatever we do, whatever directions we go, be it updownleftrighthorizontalverticalswirls, we do it with a reason.Our actions, the words we utter, our thoughts, secretly they have a meaning, weather we realize it or not. Think about it. Why do we take those actions, say those words? To me, i know the reasons. Im aware of my own actions, but those reason i couldn't speak of. At least not now.How about you?

I did it for you

To the ground

2010-03-25T00:25:00.000+08:00

Wonder why, every little thing in my life, they are so concerned, in the sense that i must do it perfectly, score high, beat others. Every little success i had, i was never appreciated. Brought to the ground. But i got back up as soon as they did that. I'm now stronger.

Its getting stronger by day,

i can hardly hide it

iThink

2010-03-23T20:51:00.002+08:00

I've realized how much things are slowly but surely changing. 3 months isn't a long period of time, but sufficient enough to cause a significant amount of change. I start to look at things from a positive side, to learn to accept others and not to look only at physical appearance, but also inner beauty.Realized that, in a new surrounding, we tend to click and match with the ones that we interact with the most.Those feelings, bound and bonded over the past month are slowly getting stronger.

There are things that i would wish I've never known.But i know that i can never look past those incidents and that things will never be the same again. What to do? Move on i guess.

There's a saying

"We don't lose friends as we grow up, but rather, we choose the good ones"

I find that quite true.Its time to leave those fakers alone. Soon...

cause i feel it so

Visually

2010-03-22T21:22:00.001+08:00

I can't wait to get out of this mess. To be able to speak what my mind thinks and how my heart feels. Maybe then, i am able to take down that mask, and let you know the truth.I really cannot stand it anymore. I've put up with everything, and now freedom is close. Just a few more weeks.....

say all i need

is the air i breathe

Shot

2010-03-21T18:31:00.001+08:00

This is just not right. I'm saying things that i do not mean. Hiding the truth.Why am i doing this? I don't know.But i just can't let it out. Doing this, makes me feel so fake.Somebody shoot me.

Shot through my heart

p/s: its my new toy x)

Reflect

2010-03-19T22:22:00.000+08:00

It got me thinking today, that all of us hides one or more deep-dark-secret(s). No matter how close two souls are, they can never be completely honest and reveal all their inner issues. There are hints in their everyday actions, but whatever secrets they hide, its so unthinkable that we miss those hints. Most of our actions reflect on what we want others to think. We are so aware of our own secrets that we take maximum precautions to keep it that way, letting only ourselves know.This also implies that, we would never really know a person's behavior. Wouldn't it be cool, to have those magic orb or mirror thing that lets us see the true nature of human?

I can go for theater!

Pro actor/poker face xD

Keep moving

2010-03-18T01:10:00.001+08:00

The sun's rays, the soft wind in my face, the smell of fresh leather, petrol and what not, made me feel excited, better yet..turned on? Wow! Yup, took the bike out for some joy ride these 2 days. Kinda made me excited, quickly, rushing back home just to get on the bike , rev it up and hear the engine speak to me. Although its just a short distance at less-than-awesome-20kmph speed, I still find it fun. Thoughts are running in my head, imagining myself cruising pass scenic places on the bike, at oh-so-awesome speed. With those shades up there, looking at the reflective mirror, made me feel so, so, awesome? Hell yeah! Like in those 80' movie when u can see them riding beside the ocean with those Harley-style cruiser bike with those aviator shades and those long 80's hair.

Wow! I'm totally lost in the 80's. =D \m/

A happy post for Ms Awesome,

after reading several of my emo post =)

Stay

2010-03-17T23:52:00.000+08:00

Sometimes when we want something to stay where they are, to be left untouched, to remain the same throughout our time here on Earth, someone moves ,changes, replaces, damages and take away that something. Sad to say that, at times, we are powerless to prevent such incidents. These are the nature of our life. Things just happen. Gotta accept the fact and move on.

"Sometimes our eyes need to be washed by our tears once in a while, so that we can see life with a clearer view again."

That's a great line. Love it. Credits to Crystal Teoh =)

Just randomizing =]

Lost for words

2010-03-16T19:47:00.002+08:00

Sometimes, i wish i can treat them normally, just as friends. Cause this feeling is making me feel weird. I don't like it. Its confusing. Its depressing. Its love?

I did say sometimes,

i didn't say everytime =)

Smile

2010-03-13T20:35:00.001+08:00

Behind every smile, there lies a secret.
It might be that, we smile because we are happy,
Or it might be, we are covering up our true emotions,
Perhaps, even trying to cheer up people around us,
However, no matter what the reason is,
we must always smile, despite the situation,
because, thats the only way we can move on.

some secrets are best kept to ourselves.

smile to cover it up =)

Lost Hope

2010-03-12T00:18:00.000+08:00

No matter what i do, what i achieved, its never enough for their standards. Though, i reach the standards they set, i still get nothing. Broken promises are synonymous to them. Their words can never be taken to be true.

And once again, i come home feeling like the king of the world, they just have to bring me down, like a slave in the underworld. Instead of words of encouragements and congratulations, i get scoldings and lectures. I stunned, and realized wow, that was fucked up. I feel as though, its my DUTY to get that results, and that i don't deserve a pat on the back, or words like " Good job son, you make me proud".

I feel, the results are of no use, worthless, if i can't even get my own parents to acknowledge my achievements. Especially after all their insults, looking down on me, and what not. Its always the same. All i get are tears. Why do i even bother? Maybe the fact that they promised me rewards for my efforts. But hey, that wouldn't be fun for them , now would it? They just had to take away my reward, and put it in a bank. I cant even enjoy my hard work. Even after coming back from an awesome time out, they just had to lecture me, saying that i spend too much money. I just wanted to treat myself to a nice time, since, they wouldn't even bother to celebrate it with me. Theres an old BM saying " susah susah dahulu, senang senang kemudian". In my situation, its more like" susah susah dahulu, terus susah kemudian" .

I've lost my mood for anything and everything. It just sucks knowing just how, insignificant my efforts are to them. Maybe its the fact that, these kind of results are expected off me. But still, i'm just a kid. I too still need love and recognition.

Test of Time

2010-03-08T16:54:00.002+08:00

Something that is pure and innocent

Tho left alone for a period of time

Will endure the test of time

Cause somethings lasts forever.

2 is better than 4

2010-02-28T22:15:00.002+08:00

Its about time, since I've felt the cool breeze, the smell of rain, that epic feeling when going downhill at fast speed, taking a sharp corner, singing songs while u cycle and talking to myself. It feels great too fall in love once again, with cycling. But this time, its different. Same place, same scenery, but it feels weird, like something is missing. Things are just not the same anymore.

The two wheels took me to place where i've never dreamt of before. The experiences, the joys, the excitements. Now those places just doesn't have the 'umph' anymore. However, i still miss those place.

Having said that, i need to find a new place. A new journey, brand new adventures, taking my two wheels further, and further away, to places where my mum would think im crazy to attempt. Rebellious? maybe. Adventures? Definitely.

I love bikes. I feel free, when im on two wheels. I prefer motorbike, than cars. Well, that depends on what car we're talking about. Heh. But generally,i'll prefer bikes. Just the sheer joy thrill and the wind, can somehow, make a man jiz.

Dilemma now. Should i argue, and take bike license, or listen to dad's advice and forget about bike?

Rawr!

2010-02-21T21:22:00.002+08:00

AH! so cute!!

But you'll never know how evil that person is until you get to know them

Kill

2010-02-17T19:08:00.002+08:00

Avoid events that destroy yourself and hurt others.

Think wisely

Shine

2010-02-13T23:38:00.003+08:00

Choose the one, that catches your eyes and attention.

Shape yourself into something extraordinary.

Out shine yourself from the others.

Be a star of your own.

Difference

2010-02-13T22:30:00.003+08:00

Its something beautiful, when it blossoms into something big,

Or when we shower it, with all we have.

But sometimes, it gets tough, when we have multiple ones, blossoming at a time,

Or when it ends up growing into something thorny, and hurt yourself.

But no matter what it blossoms into, we can never run away from it,

We like it or not,

Its always there,

Love is always there.

OK! lOl

2010-02-11T00:20:00.002+08:00

Don't we look awesome? Its cause we are! Rawr! Awesome bunch of friends and group members. Lets do our best! and enjoy college! ok?

OK! no probremm.

Chau hau sai!

LOL

2010-02-07T16:58:00.002+08:00

Awesome people =)

I have to say, college so far had been awesome. Met new people, made new awesome friends, did crazy things. Really made my time in ADP so far, a good one, and its only been a month.

Thanks guys! My jie jie , mummy and...daddy? LOL!

Wheels keep rolling

2010-01-25T00:16:00.002+08:00

How disappointing can it get, to see your project fail, even before you can complete it? 2/3 into our project, the light bulb doesn't light up. We were hoping for just that small glow, to keep our hopes alive. Instead, its our hope there were dimmed. Depressed, we called it a day, to figure out what went wrong, in an attempt to salvage our on-the-verge-of-failure project.

Although it was such a gloomy day, there were moments of delight, as Datuk Lee Chong Wei, won back-to-back titles, and his 6th Malaysian Open Title. Koo-Tan did an awesome job too. Sadly, i didnt get to watch. Was concentrating on the project.

What ever it is, our spirit and determination will not bow down.Worse case senario, we attach a battery to that bulb and hide it under the table. Shhhhh......

Cue ball

2010-01-24T01:55:00.002+08:00

1 hour into project, and we had enough of it. Yum cha!

Yum cha not syok enough? Why not some pool? OK done deal!

Yea, college for me, has been all about going to class just to listen, breaks, pool, go back home takei, sleep. Yeap, sounds chilling enough? NO! I actually have alot of projects due in the month of february. Im only procrastinating. LOL!

One thing about college, i got me addicted to pool. Hell yeah!

iSuck

2010-01-23T01:21:00.000+08:00

end of story.

Again

2010-01-21T23:55:00.002+08:00

Haiti donations!! sounded like, hi-tea donations. Heh, xD

Got that from one of the students as we went around collecting donations for the earthquake victims during moral class. Our group pwned! Awesomeness

"Those guys were stingy, and those girls were bitchy" - quoted by a member.

Having this strange feeling

Smile

2010-01-20T20:49:00.002+08:00

Lets smile to today. College is coming to life. Im starting to be myself, fitting in just perfectly. Made friends with some cool people, new friends, group members and just having fun. Certainly worth smiling to.

And i went wow today. =D

So sudden

2010-01-17T21:02:00.002+08:00

This is random but, i feel like doing some cooking. Yes, cooking. And its not gay, not for housewives only. I want to be independent, you know, when i go USA, i can cook my own Bak Kut Teh, stir fried pork, pork chop and other pork related chinese dishes.

Saw some cooking shows on AFC, man, those dished looked amazing. Gotta try them out one day. Probably, cause i love eating food, thats why, i must learn to cook them. After all, you can only truly enjoy the food, when you know how is it prepared. Right?

The Calling

2010-01-14T21:06:00.003+08:00

Big project coming up. Yes, project. Testing my engineering skills. RAWR!

"Eco-friendly week" around the week before chinese new year. Lets say, 3rd feb starting?
We, taking engineering, have to come up with a device, yes, plan, design and build, a device that can either
1.Save energy
2.Reduce waste
3.Provide clean/new energy source

And yes, we have to present it, explain how it works, why would it work, and practical to use . All under budget.

And we have like, 3 weeks to do all this? Owh god.

Plus, we are gonna have an egg drop competition. Supplied with only one A4 Cardboard,UHU glue and an egg, we, individually must come up with a method to ensure the egg, does not break upon letting it go from the 4th floor. Any ideas guys? I would really appreciate it. Lol.

And these projects actually carries 5-10% of my final grade.Thats fking alot. =X

Calculus today was just, easy? Linear inequalities? Lol. But i really miss pn. tan's teaching and sarcasm.

" Drop it or drop dead!!"
" Slip of the tongue is the fault of the mind. "
"You stupid or what? like that also dont know?!?"
"One wrong all wrong"

And wtfomgbbq!! They added Malaysian Studies to my timetable! NOOO now i go home at around 3.30 everyday except wednesday and friday. Thanks alot, malaysian studies ruined my chillex timetable. Pttf.